Smart WiFi: Just tell me where it hurts

September 5. Today, initiated into it by my eldest son, Jomar, I applied for a WiFi (wireless fidelity) broadband connection at the Smart Wireless Center in the commercial City of Calamba for our Pentium 4 PC at the university town of Los Baños. The same day, I received this text message: ‘Thank you for choosing SMART WiFi. You may now pay at any SMART Wireless Center near you using this Ref #406913683.’

WiFi is the acronym for wireless fidelity, fidelity implying that the electronic system faithfully ( ‘with fidelity’ or precisely) reproduces sounds or images. The monthly fee is a special P788 a month (down from P988, the rate in Metro Manila), with unlimited Internet access. That’s equivalent to P26 per day, where I would normally pay P20 an hour for Internet access. If our PC doesn’t have a LAN card, i would have to have it installed to make a local area network connection with the nearest Smart cellsite, which serves as the non-ISP (Internet service provider) bridge between our PC and the Internet. The LAN card costs P310, installed free in the PC. I’m going to have that LAN card installed and pay the P788 tomorrow; and hope that it will be the start of something great! Thank you Smart Communications.

September 13. On the 7^th, a Wednesday, I paid the P788 plus P1000 installation fee. I asked the girl how soon the WiFi would be installed, and she replied by a question: ‘4 days?’ She didn’t know for sure. She told me to wait for a call. I didn’t wait. Friday, I texted 5488 (based on the leaflet she handed me): ‘I paid P1788 for my WiFi connection in Los Baños. How soon can you install for Ref #406913683.’ The reply: ‘Hintayin na lang po ninyo ang call ng scheduler.’ (Please just wait for the call of the scheduler.’) No, I didn’t wait. I texted Saturday: ‘Any good news for my Los Baños WiFi #406913683?’ No reply. The next day, Sunday, I received a call from a girl, the Scheduler I suppose, telling me that my WiFi will be installed Friday, September 16. That long to wait? I thanked the girl anyway. It would be a nice birthday gift to me who was born on the 17^th of September 1940.

September 15, Thursday. I can hardly wait for tomorrow to make the WiFi connection to the wide, wide world. I asked the girl what time Friday and she said she didn’t know exactly.

September 16. 1600 hours, Friday. No sign of them. I send this text to 5488: ‘Still waiting for installing my WiFi which you scheduled for today. If you do it, my birthday tomorrow will be complete. Frank Hilario’ Reply to my text: ‘Sir verify ko lang po yong account name: Frank Agapito Hilario. Thanks!’ I reply, ‘That’s correct.’ But no more is heard from them. It’s 1820 hours as I write these lines. I intend to text them again tomorrow.

September 17, 0642 hours, Saturday. I text 5488: ‘Good morning! I’m inviting you to the town fiesta of Los Baños. It also happens to be my birthday.’ Still no show. I will text them again tomorrow, but nicely. I borrowed a CD from a neighbor – where I eat (for P15) a bowl of mami complete with calamansi, plenty of garlic, and plenty of hot chili – and there are 19 songs, mostly by local singers. Tell me where it hurts, MYMP. Love takes time, Mariah Carey. We belong together, Mariah Carey. Incomplete, Backstreet Boys. Thank you for your love, Dimsum. Better days, Dianne Reeves. Get right, Jennifer Lopez. Hold you down, Jennifer Lopez. The day you say goodnight, Hale. It’s like that, Mariah Carey. Deliverance, Kitchie Nadal. Get me, MYMP. Through the fire, Nina. Every little thing, MYMP. Sa kanya, MYMP. Minamalas, Mojofly. Limang dipang tao, Barbie’s Cradle. Heart of mine, Janno Gibbs. Pinakamagandang lalaki, Janno Gibbs. I intend to send a text message everyday with the title of a song from that CD and the singer. A gentle reminder that, hey, somebody cares – all you have to do is reciprocate.

September 18, about 1400 hours, Sunday. I text 5488: ‘Just tell me where it hurts. MYMP.’ In a few minutes comes the text from 0918-216-7514: ‘Sir, sa smart wifi p 2. San k u sa mayondon sir d2 na kmi.’ Translation: Sir, we are from Smart WiFi. Where are you in Mayondon? We’re here already.’ So I called and gave them directions. Since it is a little bit tricky to come to our place at 12571 Dangka Street, Mayondon, Los Baños, Laguna, because it’s a tiny street you can easily miss, I sent my son Edwin to the crossroad to watch for them. After about 5 minutes of waiting, I called again and gave added directions. In a little while, they got here. In about an hour, we were WiFi-connected. Thank you, gentlemen. Good job. 1619 hours. I remember to text: ‘We’re connected. Thank you Smart WiFi! Frank Hilario.’ Text back: ‘Thanks! For the update.’ The feeling is mutual.